{"id":137110,"date":"2021-05-27T09:00:24","date_gmt":"2021-05-27T13:00:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/?p=137110"},"modified":"2023-11-01T16:44:43","modified_gmt":"2023-11-01T20:44:43","slug":"delilah-koch-on-repurposing-trauma-through-self-love-compassion-and-introspection","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/delilah-koch-on-repurposing-trauma-through-self-love-compassion-and-introspection\/","title":{"rendered":"Delilah Koch On Overcoming Disordered Habits and Mental Health Stigma"},"content":{"rendered":"<style>\n.centerimg {padding:4em 7em;margin:20px 0;}\n.centerimg2 {padding:4em 4em;margin:20px 0;}\n.centerimg3 {padding:4em 3em;margin:20px 0;}\n.sidetxt {padding:16em 2em 16em 2em;;margin:20px 0;}\n.centerimg img {margin-bottom:0px;}\n.instagram-media {margin:auto !important;}\n#wp-content hr {margin: 40px auto 80px auto;width: 80%;}\n<\/style>\n<p><strong>In a fast-paced industry like fashion, mental health can be overlooked or worse, seen as minuscular. Living through a global pandemic has significantly increased symptoms of anxiety, depression, and much more for the collective culture. Loss has been a shared experience for the majority, whether it&#8217;s a loss of a relative, a sense of normalcy, or of jobs \u2014 the past year and a half has been a mental battlefield for most. According to National Alliance on Mental Health (NAMI), \u201ctwo in five Americans have suffered from various forms of mental health struggles since the start of the pandemic.\u201d As we all battle various forms of the emotional toll, Models.com continues this week highlighting models who are speaking out to de-stigmatize mental health in fashion. We spoke to Montana-born <a href=\"\/\/models.com\/models\/delilah-koch\">Delilah Koch<\/a> on how she overcame an eating disorder, her mother\u2019s suicide, forgiving herself, and regaining her spark through journaling, meditation, and introspection. <\/strong><\/p>\n<div class=\"centerimg\">\n<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i.mdel.net\/oftheminute\/images\/2021\/05\/image000051-580x640.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"580\" height=\"640\" class=\"alignnone size-medium wp-image-137122\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i.mdel.net\/oftheminute\/images\/2021\/05\/image000051-580x640.jpeg 580w, https:\/\/i.mdel.net\/oftheminute\/images\/2021\/05\/image000051.jpeg 1102w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 580px) 100vw, 580px\" \/><br \/>\n<small>Courtesy of <a href=\"https:\/\/models.com\/models\/delilah-koch\" rel=\"noopener\" target=\"_blank\">Delilah Koch <\/a><\/small>\n<\/div>\n<p><strong>How were you first discovered and what about modeling excited you at first?<\/strong><br \/>\nI have always loved fashion, I spent my childhood rummaging through my mom\u2019s closet, putting on shows in our hallway, and only wearing heels around the house. I was scouted in high school, however, I was still very young and living in Montana so I decided to finish school. After I graduated, I went to Coachella and was scouted again, and soon after I packed my bags and moved across the country and the rest is history! Everything in this industry inspires me. I love the creativity, risks, and passion involved. <\/p>\n<p><strong>\u2028How have you been able to balance your mental wellness in such a fast-paced industry?<\/strong><br \/>\nBoundaries. I have mental checklists for myself that help me remain grounded, for example, journaling has become one of my favorite parts of the day. I write everything as it\u2019s a safe place to release everything that\u2019s on your mind. Letters to loved ones I miss, letters to myself, things I\u2019m grateful for, my emotions, and also my pains. Once it\u2019s on paper I can have a clear view of the areas of my life I can consciously change and have control over. I can focus more on myself, how I feel, and also how I process what is happening around me.<\/p>\n<p>Making time to read is also very important for me, choosing to read a few chapters instead of scrolling social media has made a drastic difference in my mental health. I love to read self-help books, they\u2019re full of inspiration, love, and encouragement that leave you feeling optimistic and hopeful. Going for walks, taking deep breaths meditating, and having a moment of silence always brings me peace when I\u2019m feeling overwhelmed. Closing your eyes and letting your mind rest is pure medicine, letting go of the outside influences, and diving deep into introspection by asking yourself questions on why you think the way you do and why you continue destructive behaviors. <\/p>\n<p>https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/CNYkk1ZlLMN\/<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u2028What are some mental health challenges that you\u2019ve had to overcome and how have you been healing from these challenges? <\/strong><br \/>\nThis is the first time I\u2019ve decided to be open and share my own story and struggles with an eating disorder. I knew all the information, signs, and red flags&#8230;or so I thought. I was taught how to use calorie counting apps, compared meals, and view food and body image in a terrible light. Starvation is not the answer, you\u2019re left feeling hungry, anxious, and exhausted. Immediately I could feel the effects that it played on my body. <\/p>\n<p>Eating disorders are mental illnesses. They can be triggered by a caloric deficit, environment, and body image just to name a few. I began to notice changes in my moods, behaviors, and health. I slowly distanced myself from friends, social gatherings involving food and spent most of my time isolated. My hair became thin, my body felt exhausted, my energy was depleted and I lost the spark inside. I ran my body to the ground going from one HIIT class to the next. I would become defensive and upset when my friends or family would express their concerns for me, convincing them I was fine, healthy, and happy. At this point, I was petrified of change, scared to break my \u201croutine\u201d, and terrified to ask for help. I finally was open and honest with my family and friends and decided to take my health seriously. I re-taught myself how to eat as an adult. I erased any old knowledge I had on food and learned to see food as essential, healing, and joyous! Now I am delighted when a friend asks me to go out to a restaurant or invites me to their home for a meal. I learned to forgive myself, my past, and my mistakes. I feel like myself again and I have my spark back.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>&#8220;Allow yourself to evolve and prove to you, not anyone else, that you can overcome these seeming obstacles and transform them into growth and lessons.&#8221;<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><strong>\u2028As someone who overcame an eating disorder and suicide in your family, how have you been able to heal from this trauma?<\/strong><br \/>\nPatience. Forgiveness. Compassion. My mom, Jessica, was in and out of treatment most of my childhood. We would visit her in the summer when she was inpatient, but when she was home she rarely ate meals with us. As I grew older I started to see her health decline, laxative abuse eroded holes in her throat and stomach lining, purging after meals, and her mental health plummeted. She spent days on the couch or in bed, unable to take my brother and me to school. I realize the severity of her bipolar disorder and eating disorders now that I am older but at the time I just thought my mom was extremely tired. There would be weeks where she was riding on Cloud 9, taking us to the mall, going out to eat, surprising us with movies and road trips, and then weeks of her unable to move. The day before she passed, we spent lunch giggling about inside jokes and memories we loved. I had absolutely no idea that the next day she would be gone. My mom passed away on a Friday, we had her funeral Saturday and I was back in school Monday as if nothing had happened. She didn\u2019t leave a note, she didn\u2019t show any signs and she didn\u2019t ask for help. <\/p>\n<p>You have to take all the time you need to grieve because every single person handles loss differently. Embrace the feelings, it\u2019s ok to be mad, sad, confused, or lost. My mom was abundantly loved, cherished, and adored. She seemingly had everything she wanted, and still, her mental illness seemed to be overpowering in the situation. If you need medication for whatever you are facing, please do not feel guilty or embarrassed. If I could give any advice to someone struggling or feeling suicidal, I would say please do not be afraid to ask for help. Seek counseling if you can afford it! We are so lucky to have multiple ways of talking to doctors whether it be on the phone, online, or in person. Spend time with your friends, hug your family, and continue with your life in honor of their spirit. Remember you are not alone, you are worth it, you are good enough, and you deserve to be happy. This is just the beginning! Allow yourself to evolve and prove to you, not anyone else, that you can overcome these seeming obstacles and transform them into growth and lessons. <\/p>\n<p><strong>\u2028How have you kept up a wellness routine in the midst of a global pandemic?<\/strong><br \/>\nHonestly, my wellness routine started during the pandemic! I took advantage of all the free time and dove deep into my passions, hobbies, and learning. Wellness means something different for everyone. I love to keep my mental health #1. I cherish my reading and writing time because it helps me prepare for the day with fresh eyes and a clear mind. Sometimes I\u2019ll make myself some tea, go outside and sit at the park, FaceTime my Grandma or friends, and make myself a nice breakfast. Letting everyday flow, being able to adapt, and be spontaneous is huge for me.<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"instagram-media\" data-instgrm-captioned data-instgrm-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/CORAUPJl_Fg\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" data-instgrm-version=\"14\" style=\" background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:500px; min-width:326px; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% - 2px); width:calc(100% - 2px);\">\n<div style=\"padding:16px;\"> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/CORAUPJl_Fg\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" style=\" background:#FFFFFF; line-height:0; padding:0 0; text-align:center; text-decoration:none; width:100%;\" target=\"_blank\"> <\/p>\n<div style=\" display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;\">\n<div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;\">\n<div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;\"><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"padding: 19% 0;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"display:block; height:50px; margin:0 auto 12px; width:50px;\"><svg width=\"50px\" height=\"50px\" viewBox=\"0 0 60 60\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"https:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" xmlns:xlink=\"https:\/\/www.w3.org\/1999\/xlink\"><g stroke=\"none\" stroke-width=\"1\" fill=\"none\" fill-rule=\"evenodd\"><g transform=\"translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)\" fill=\"#000000\"><g><path d=\"M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631\"><\/path><\/g><\/g><\/g><\/svg><\/div>\n<div style=\"padding-top: 8px;\">\n<div style=\" color:#3897f0; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:550; line-height:18px;\">View this post on Instagram<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"padding: 12.5% 0;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;\">\n<div>\n<div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);\"><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"margin-left: 8px;\">\n<div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg)\"><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"margin-left: auto;\">\n<div style=\" width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);\"><\/div>\n<div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);\"><\/div>\n<div style=\" width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);\"><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;\">\n<div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\" background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;\"><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p><\/a><\/p>\n<p style=\" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/CORAUPJl_Fg\/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading\" style=\" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px; text-decoration:none;\" target=\"_blank\">A post shared by Delilah (@delilahkoch)<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"\/\/platform.instagram.com\/en_US\/embeds.js\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u2028What parts of the fashion industry contribute to mental health struggles for you and what do you think needs to change?<\/strong><br \/>\nI think the industry is taking a wonderful turn in the right direction, with more inclusivity in body types and ethnicities. However, there is still a fine line between \u201crunway\u201d and \u201cnormal\u201d. Every single model, male or female, has different proportions, measurements, and body types. I will never forget the words my first agent said to me that started some of my poor eating disordered behaviors. I feel thankful knowing that more and more people are becoming accepting of multiple body types and sizes. Fashion should be all-inclusive because everyone deserves to fit comfortably in the clothing they love and dream of wearing. I love seeing diversity continue to grow in the industry because it leaves room for more creativity, talent, and conversation. We all have value to add to the world. <\/p>\n<p><strong>\u2028How does being vocal about mental health destigmatize it?<\/strong><br \/>\nMental illness affects more people than not. Whether it be anxiety, depression, eating disorders, or even OCD. It seems that talking about our stories and feelings can be taboo, but in actuality, it can be very transformative in the healing process. It\u2019s isolating to stay in your head and deal with overwhelming thoughts alone because you have no other outside source to tell you what you\u2019re thinking isn\u2019t true. If my story can help one person feel heard, seen, and understood then I would feel fulfilled. I feel extremely thankful that I can share my experiences in the hopes that I can shed light and not glamorize eating disorders or mental illness. There is no one size fits for mental illness. We are all different and individuals but at the same time we all share similar stories, traumas, and pains.<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u2028What advice would you give to up-and-coming models who are dealing with emotional health challenges?<\/strong><br \/>\nBe compassionate with yourself, take a step back, and focus on what makes you happy. Is what you\u2019re doing sustainable? Is it adding to your overall health and well-being? Do you feel joy in what you\u2019re giving your energy to? It took a lot of time to reconsider my values and how I envisioned my life long-term. I wanted to be able to feel comfortable eating anything at the table, have freedom around food, nurture and care for my body in healthy, yet sustainable ways. Speak up on what you\u2019re passionate about, explore all of your hobbies and talents, and ask for help if you need it. Put time aside for you, set boundaries, be honest with your agents, and let your light shine.<br \/>\n<!--pp-thumb-start--><!--PictPress found no dir \/2021\/05\/137110--><!--pp-thumb-end--><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In a fast-paced industry like fashion, mental health can be overlooked or worse, seen as minuscular. Living through a global pandemic has significantly increased symptoms of anxiety, depression, and much more for the collective culture. Loss has been a shared experience for the majority, whether it&#8217;s a loss of a relative, a sense of normalcy,&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":450,"featured_media":137126,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10414,16,13940],"tags":[12930,12375],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/137110"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/450"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=137110"}],"version-history":[{"count":24,"href":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/137110\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":137398,"href":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/137110\/revisions\/137398"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/137126"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=137110"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=137110"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/models.com\/oftheminute\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=137110"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}